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I don’t like social media, but I use it because I have to. The main reason I don’t like it is, people. They use and abuse it no end. I recently deactivated my Tumblr account. At first, it was a good platform. But then, after a while, the level of smut appearing on a daily basis became so ridiculous, I felt it was time to leave … for good.
Now for Facebook.
I keep my friends count low, because I do not feel the need to just accept any random person as a friend, and don’t feel the need to be popular. I don’t post much on my personal profile, but I have a page for my blog, where posts from my three blogs can be found in one place.
Now, what I loathe about this particular platform, is that even when you have checked your privacy settings, and are somewhat satisfied with it, something else is on show. I don’t like this. Not one bit. This isn’t protecting your privacy at all, is it?
I am a part of many groups for blogging and business. Very recently, I noticed someone follow a bunch of groups I’ve been a part of for a little while. Whilst I understand these groups are for everyone, considering they are not interlinked, I found this rather odd. So, I sent a private message to that said person, whereby I stated it may or may not be the case, but asked that if they are looking at my profile could they please stop, as I felt like they are stalking me (so didn’t actually accuse them of doing so), and it’s making me feel uncomfortable. I wasn’t rude and wished them well.
Simple, huh?
Nope!
I received a message back telling me how I insulted the person, how “for someone who posts positive quotes” my message to the person was quite harsh. Not to mention that I was rude to approach the person and accuse them of stalking me. The person then muted the conversation – which is fine by me. I find them insufferable anyway, pretentious and fake.
Now, clearly, I did not accuse the person of anything, I merely asked a question, but the saying “If the shoe fits …” comes to mind. For someone who claims they have done nothing wrong, they a) didn’t read the message properly, so only saw what they wanted to see, which was my accusing them of stalking, which I did not, and b) certainly had such a big reaction to something they claim not to have done.
Just because I post Positive Quotes, it does not mean I do not have the right to ask questions if I think/feel something is amiss. It is my right to do so, and so I shall.
One thing I learned from being on Facebook, nothing is ever really private. I deactivated my account almost 2 years ago. Social media is simply that– meant to be “social” and interactive, those privacy settings always shift and change and you have to stay on top of them constantly.
You had a right to ask. But honestly, that person had a right to their reaction too. Does not make it right or wrong, just makes them who they are.
Good luck with maintaining your privacy wishes there. That’s going to be hard, especially if you have a public profile.
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Hey Tre, I think you’re right about the privacy part. My personal profile is private though. It always has been. And I keep up to date with changes, making sure it remains just that – private, so am unsure why certain information is on show, when it doesn’t need to be. Only my page is public as it need to be.
Yes, I had a right to ask and yes, the person had a right to react the way they did, because all their response did was show their guilt! It shows what I suspected!
Hope you’re having a great weekend. P. x
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I am. Yes, thank you. I hope you are as well.
I just couldn’t continue to monitor what I thought didn’t need monitoring, but you have to because of the constant shifts there. They are truly not for your privacy. Peace, lady. Enjoy your upcoming week.
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Good to hear. May you have a wonderful wwek ahead.
I know they’re not, which is why they’re in so much trouble right now.
Bless. Thank you for your kind words.
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Thank you. You’re most welcome.
And yes, you’re quite correct.
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Good for your, Persia
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Many thanks, Derrick.
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Amen Sister! Facebook has had a slew of security breeches especially in the U.S.
My Facebook account was hacked yet again in June and I was locked out.
Finally I decided to stop posting and let my Facebook account slumber.
Like you I mainly use my account to promote my Photography and artwork.
As for the Facebook groups I left 90% of them because they are not properly monitored and are filled with racists and bigots.
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Thanks, DeBorah. Sorry your FB account was hacked again. I understand why you just let it ‘slumber’. Honestly, the attitude of some is just disgusting. I merely asked a question – politely at that, but some act as if you’re not allowed to do so. The reaction was shocking.
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Yes shocking but not surprising. Somehow folks think that social media gives them a type of anonymity. Or the right to do things online that they wouldn’t dare do in person. Online stalkers can be just as dangerous. If someone I didn’t really know was following me netwide and joining the same groups I was a part of I’d be suspicious also. Facebook is weirdo city.
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Precisely. I found it very odd, considering the sheer amount of groups out there, why the ones I’m with? That sure does raise an eyebrow. And the person thinks because I post positive quotes, I’m not allowed to ask a question! Is that not one of the dumbest things you’ve ever heard?!
Thanks. That’s my new name for FB – Weirdo City! I love it. So fitting!
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Things that make you go Hmmmm…
My Dad Edward Palmer used to say Don’t mistake kindness for weakness.
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Amen, Mr. Palmer. Amen.
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Also, I agree; some groups are not monitored properly, although I’ve never encountered racism from any I’ve been in. Bigots? Absolutely!
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Yes. Sadly there are some sick white Americans who think it’s a joke when Black people get shot or attacked. One white woman had the nerve and audacity to say that I should be glad that my ancestors were brought to America as slaves otherwise I too would have Ebola.
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What in the hell did I just read? Say what?????? I would have hit the frigging roof! Seriously, what the f**k????
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I quickly left those Facebook poetry groups. Given that I’ve had white folks call me everything but a child of God, this does not surprise me. That encounter was about 3 or 4 years ago.
Since #45 was elected white folks true ugly nature has really been on display. I’m glad to be retiring next month in August 16th.
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Wow! 😮 I’m so sorry, DeBorah.
Already?! Next month? I’m so happy for you. But the time really did fly by!
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Thanks. Yes may this month pass quickly! Come on August!
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🙏🏾🙏🏾
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I will send out a Happy Dance blog post on the auspicious day!
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Looking forward to reading it!
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😉😀😃
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I think that you were within your right to message that user. I believe that virtual communities are slowly built, and we follow people by what interests us. Unfortunately in WordPress, and it seems like it on Facebook (based on your description) that people take short cuts and follow for the sake of following.
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Thank you. These days, it’s as if it’s a crime to question something – even if you are not rude about it. Some people really think highly of themselves, therefore feel ‘insulted’ if you say or ask something they don’t like.
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Face Book had another issue this week, I closed me account after one day. I was going to play my dog posting, his name is Shaggy but I call him Shaggy Noodle, wow! the smut received was enough for me. Shaggy Noodle doesn’t make me think of a penis but apparently it does for many. I use twitter for post and to advocate with a handful of charities. I have almost 5K followers and follow 22. It’s nuts how people troll or look for affirmations from complete strangers.
Have a great weekend.
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Wow, just wow. This is what was happening in Tumblr. Deactivated! I’m surprised this is happening on FB. It’s probably better you closed your account. I really wish I could but I can’t. Not yet, anyway. I find some people’s behaviour odd, to say the least, but this one took the biscuit. I only asked a question. If the person had not have followed all those groups in a burst, I wouldn’t have asked the question in the first place!
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The two FB issues were huge! To be any company large or small to not know & have confidentiality agreement of partner is unacceptable. And to have this happen twice with in a month is crazy. I’m on Twitter but only follow charities and bands, rarely comment. I have almost 5K followers but don’t understand why. Not that many are reading my blog. That’s not why I do it, just want to keep on top of issues I care about.
Hope all is well.
M
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It sure is crazy. With one of my accounts on twitter, like you, I pretty much follow charities only. I don’t blame you for limiting platforms usage. Sometimes it’s more stress than it;s worth.
Yes, I’m fine, thanks. Hope you are too.
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excellent post……
I had so many problems with Facebook, i can’t even begin to tell you.
I tried going ‘friends only’. Then discovered some of them were trolling me too. bizarre(?!).
what i mean by ‘trolling me’ is: they were posting these negative things, then including me in the post……I was so angry…I deleted my account.
there is this wonderful quote. It goes: ‘no one has the right not to be offended’.
this quote really helped me to to cope with people being offended.
Cheers, Gavin.
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Thanks!
Wow, some of your friends were trolling you?! What on the world … Why would they do that? What os wrong with some people? That’s quite a number of people I know now who have closed their FB accounts. Hmm … got me thinking … maybe there is another way for me to get info across without the use of FB.
Brilliant quote. I tell you, this person dug into me just because I asked a polite question, then twisted what I said to perhaps make themselves feel better. Guilt …?
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Several of my ‘friends’ on Facebook, weren’t really friends…..and it was a subtle way of shaming me by including me in there posts…..Several others were also included too, so I didn’t feel so isolated.
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*shake my head* At least now you’re no longer a part of that nonsense.
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Facebook is still problematic in how they handle privacy and user data. There seems to be a lingering problem with clickbait. They still have much to do. I think people on Facebook by in large are meaner in their comments too.
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You are absolutely right, Tony. I have the right settings, yet some information I do not wish to be in show, is on show. Doesn’t make sense. I also find, like you, yes they are meaner with their comments. I find online as a whole, a very testy place, where people will say and do what they want, then try to belittle you when you ask them a question, or to stop. I’m sure you know already, I won’t be quiet!
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