Shifting Blame onto the Survivior

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Blame Shifting

blame

Under normal circumstances, I would not write a post about this, but after reading this article, I felt the need to.

I am absolutely sick to death of blame shifting. Whether it be a victim from a Domestic Abuse situation, wrongly being blamed; or from a parent blaming others for what I believe, a situation which clearly begins from home.

England/UK, has become a right mess because of the exaggerated use of all this PC bullshit, not to mention the Human Rights Act being taken out of context – namely, working in favour of criminals.

building on sand

Back to this article. It has annoyed me no end.

UK counter-terror officials criticised over Syria-bound missing schoolgirls

Why the hell are UK Counter-Terror Officials to be blamed? I’m sorry, but if the parents missed what their children were doing, why should the blame lie on the shoulders of someone else? How is this fair? Let’s put it like this; if they had been stopped at the airport, no doubt a lawyer would have turned it into something like this; “You only stopped her because she’s a Muslim”, or the Human Rights Act card would have been pulled. It is not unusual for fifteen year olds to travel by themselves. In fact, when I was flying to the US last year summer, there were two brothers sat next to me, with no parent to be seen. One was around twelve; the other around seven.

Someone would of had to have paid for their tickets, not to mention give them access to their passports. I know mine and my son‘s passports are in a ‘safe place’ – not that he’s old enough to grab his passport and leave home. And surely, there must have been some sort of suspicious behaviour from these three, which should have raised an eyebrow with their parents.

My point is, if the parents missed it, why the frigging hell should it be someone else’s duty to spot it? I mean one father even stated that his daughter had told him she was going to a wedding.

men are clever

I guess it’s not the greatest of comparisons, but it reminds me when I was with my (ex) husband *Steve who blamed me for everything he did wrong. Good grief, when are people going to accept responsibility for their own wrong doings? Is it a wonder why the world is in the state it is today?

Does this make me a racist? No, it does not. One of my best friends is Muslim. She has helped me to no end in my time of need. When she’s had her downs in life, I have been there for her. When I’ve had my downs in life, she has been there for me. In fact, she and her husband were the ones who put a free roof over my head and fed me when I was hungry, when I was left with nothing after leaving my son’s father, not to mention, she was the one driving me around to get my Green Card sorted out and then some. I feel I owe her a lot, but she believes our friendship is more than enough.

We have been friends for twenty years this year. I have never seen her behave in such a way like the Isis/IS. Nor have I ever heard her speak ill of my religion, just like I have not spoken ill of hers. I will never convert to hers; she will never convert to mine, not that we have tried to convince each other to do so. Yet we don’t see a problem. We see each other as equal. I, for the record, am a Christian ~ Church of England to be precise, so there is a bit of Catholicism too. Twenty years of friendship is a hell of a long time, so what is up with all this hate and war, in this day and age in the name of ‘religion’? It’s not religion. No, it’s to quench the thirst for blood and death from those who simply enjoy terrorising people.

The future of our children rely heavily on what they are taught at home first and foremost. If they are taught that to get out of a situation means to blame someone else, then indeed this is what they will conform to. Things will undoubtedly, get worse.

These girls must have been researching on how to join (or something along these lines), to be able to get ‘brainwashed’ into going to join the Isis/IS, who might I add, have no respect for anyone, not matter which religion you follow. I have watched videos of their executions (beheadings, burning, etc), and it really is not a pretty sight. It is nothing less than disturbing, that human beings can act in such a barbaric way. Sometimes, I am unable to sleep from how appalled I am by their vicious acts. But I will not turn a blind eye to it.

Perhaps, once again, not a very good comparison, but I could no longer turn a blind eye to the way humans (not all of course) treat animals. After the brutal and sadistic deaths of my kittens (see here and here) at the hands of my (ex) husband, I threw my hurt, sorrow and pain into becoming an Animal Advocate. I will have been an active Advocate for two years this July.

My point is, not for a minute, did I stop to think (for example) “Wow, Steve drowning my kitten Jacob really appeals to me, so let me join in”. If you join the Isis/IS, are willing travel there at the age of fifteen, and are ‘smart’ enough to convince your parents that you were attending a wedding, you know what you are doing. You know what you are getting into. Their behaviour is no secret; they and the media have made sure of that. Humanitarians and Aid Workers have gone to help those in peril. What has happened to many of them? Death by prolonged beheadings. By this, I mean their heads are not chopped off in one fell swoop (not that this would make it any better, however, would minimise the victims suffering), but they are literally sawn off from the front to back. This must feel like an eternity in hell for the victim. I cannot even imagine their pain.

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A few days ago, I read how twenty-one Corpus Christians were executed by this group. The next picture had the following caption:

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Horror: Blood is seen in the Mediterranean Sea. In the video the jihadis say they now plan to ‘conquer Rome.

Seriously, how can this appeal to any one?

I for one, at the age of fifteen, was worried about not getting bad grades in school, and trying to figure out which college I wanted to attend. And that’s exactly what these girls should have been doing, not leaving the safety of their home to join a group who hell bent on an horrific killing spree.

The UK Counter-Terror Officials have a lot on their plates already, without having to keep tabs on every soul who thinks the ‘hip’ thing to do these days is to join the Isis/IS. Remember,

You can lead a horse to water, but you can’t make it drink.

I know not what we are going to do to overcome this, but I know this; blame shifting is not the answer.

We need peace before mankind destroys itself.

Peace is the only way forward.

Rant over.

*Images from the web.

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5 Differences Between a TRUE VICTIM & FALSE VICTIM of Narcissistic Abuse

“The stuff that is done to us by narcissists, is SO INSIDIOUS; it literally baffles us into muddled brain fog.” ~ After Narcissist Abuse

After Narcissistic Abuse

true vs false victim

It’s NOT EASY using the V word.

Personally, I don’t LIKE it. It’s not a word I’ve used to describe myself through very many situations in my life, because I am the kind of person who takes responsibility for things that happen to me. While, I certainly had choices and consequences (thus responsibility) in my relationship with a narcissist as an adult – it is the only experience I think the V label accurately describes and depicts.

I was caught unaware. I was told things that weren’t true. By relying on those things, I made decisions that put me in harms way. I was sold a bill of goods and promises by a person who was well aware that they had no intention of ever delivering on those promises nor being capable of being a GOOD PERSON towards me, so that he could use me for things that benefited ONLY…

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